May 29, 2012

 

 

He turned to me in bed today,

and said those three little words

that he says every weekend,

whatever the weather, come what may.

Even before I’d opened my eyes

I could feel his intense glance.

‘Got any bacon?’ he uttered,

as I came out of my sleeping trance.

 

 

May 28, 2012

 

 

When it comes to chairs, he’s sat in them all,

Even the one in the corner, against the wall.

 

He doesn’t like the one nearest to the telly,

It gives him cramp and his foot turns to jelly.

 

The one in the window really cricks his neck

And when he stands up he shouts ‘Oh Heck’

 

Even on the sofa he has some moans,

As it wasn’t made for his tired old bones.

 

He’s tried the rocker, by the back the door.

But he fell asleep and slid onto the floor.

 

The old recliner, has safety wings,

But this plays havoc with his private ‘things’

 

The dining chair he finds too erect,

One hasn’t been made that he finds perfect

 

Every time he sits down to read the paper,

He springs up again, two seconds later.

 

This chair tester baffles his wife, it’s true,

That’s why she’s bought a tube of super glue.

 

 

 

 

 

The pain will never go away,

But his memory we still hold dear.

And when we pause to think of him,

He seems so very near.

 

It was a joy to know him,

Though briefly, he did stay.

He’s still a part of our family,

And will always remain that way.

 

His smile was easy – I can see it now,

So clear, in my minds eye.

I live each day with one regret,

That we never said Goodbye.

 

 

 

 

May 23, 2012

 

 

Please forgive my mood today

I’m sure you don’t think there’s any need

To put you through this living hell

But once a month we women bleed

 

 

It begins in adolescence

It’s sometimes called The Curse

This cycle stays with us for most of our life

And as we get older, it often gets worse!

 

 

It can make some women suicidal

And drive others right round the bend

Until we get menopausal

A living hell without an end

 

 

There doesn’t seem any rhyme or reason

‘Stop this pain God!’ we often plead

It’s all part of being a female

Once a month we women bleed

 

 

May 20, 2012

 

 

To yearn and not touch

And appear free from lust

Is an improbability

 

To love unconditionally

And not experience hurt

Is an impossibility

 

 

 

 

The over optimistic cool dude

The spinner of yarn onto a

mythical spool

The childlike fantasist

and you, the innocent believer

and fool!

 

 

 

 

 

A melting menagerie of muddled

minds. Raucous unruliness.

Just men being men

 

 

 

 

Don’t give me that

load of old frog spawn

You croaking toad

with bulging eyes,

and flaring nostrils

revealing your lies!

 

 

 

 

 

What she lacked in education

She made up for in humour.

She was young and exciting

As graceful as a puma

So tall and energetic.

So powerfully beguiling.

He knew he couldn’t contain her

But for a while she had him smiling.

 

 

May 19, 2012

 

 

The sheep is lying on his back,

Nearly strangled by the fence netting.

And the sight of a horn entangled,

As you know, can be very upsetting!

 

We’ve told him more than once or twice

The serious dangers of trampoling!

But would he listen, would he heck.

He’s now been released and stood up reeling!

 

 

 

 

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